Be supportive, empathic and understanding. > Why my 4 yr old child is shy around strangers 100% of the time, but not with us her parents? A child who is defiant, stubbornly refuses to cooperate and ignores simple requests can make every day feel like an uphill struggle. First, you’re stripping him of his many other qualities and allowing the label to define his personality. Never criticise or mock your child when they are shy. He won’t answer quickly enough. My 11 year old dd is lively, popular and chatty, (with her friends and even with other children we meet at the swimming pool or on holiday, etc). She's probably just somewhat timid by nature. He’s too quiet. At home she was all talk and personality. For example, if she doesn’t like being in big groups, keep her birthdays small with only a few close friends instead of that big bash with 15 kids and a magician. Has she always been quiet, inward looking, or hesitant around strangers or group activities? Working with Your Shy Child. Make sure your child knows you love and accept her. Here are 10 tips for helping your extremely shy child: Don’t label your child as “shy.” When you label your child as “shy,” you’re doing two things. How to Get Your Child to Listen: Children’s selective hearing is a big source of frustration for parents! Help Your Child Enjoy Social Interaction and Learn Social Skills Through Everyday Experiences. He’s too shy. The problem is with adults, even ones she knows well like grandparents, neighbours, my friends etc. People ask your child a question and you are quick to answer for him. Children use their fantasy friends to practice verbal skills, boost their confidence and for role play. A shy child may take longer to warm up to a situation, but they eventually do. She was actually evaluated because she spoke late and ended up having speech and occupational therapy for 2 years. Be careful not to label your child as ‘shy’. But many, like your boy, don't have a someone. When my middle child, Gabrielle was 4 she was the same way. Respect her needs, when you can. Some -- those who are simply shy -- come back to life when they get home, becoming animated, fiesty and fully engaged with family members. A child’s level of clinginess, and the way it is expressed, may be affected by: child temperament: some children are more socially shy or introverted; … Hi. In contrast, children with social phobia will get very upset when they have to interact with people. They say hello and she … Children (and adults) tend to live up to the labels others give them. Give your child some space to talk for himself. Shy children don’t have to magically turn into life-of-the-party extroverts in order to fit in and have friends. Don’t let other people label your child as shy either. I am a mom of three. They move like a shadow through their school day, desperately waiting for the end-of-school bell that signals relief from the seven hours of social hell. She couldn't look an adult in the eye and hardly spoke around other adults. Toddlers tend to be shy for two major reasons: First, your child may simply have a shy temperament. Also, a shy child engages with other kids, just at a different level of intensity than their peers.